Something is wrong, very wrong . Even after everything is going my way . I am not feeling the bliss . I laugh lke a maniac sometimes but that doesnt mean I am happy . Maybe the face reader ankita said the right words for me that I can never be happy until and unless I forgive myself and be satisfied with what I have got . The dream of living with friends in a different city and letting myself out of control is going on. I am living it for past 10 days and now I am over with it .Now I want a different dream to live for , to vouch for and to live for . Maybe I am still not over my nightmarish blunder of sleeping and not writing a word in my IIT maths exam for which i got a big 0. At that time I thought or maybe I wont be able to recall what I thought. So now when I express myself it will be a twirl of thoughts , but before I bring back those memories , you should know more about me .
1 : I like to self destruct . I will never save a program that I made and in the end I will spend more time in recalling it rather than starting from scratch .
2: I don't smoke becaus I am addicted to it .I smok because I hav nothing else to do it at that time or because I want to destroy myself.
3: I feel I am not addicted to anything . but I think cigarettes have become my lifelong companion i dont want to part with. May be for a good cause I will quit it but till then lets burn the cigrettes and lungs alike .
4: One more BIG fact , I will prepare and practice harder than anyone else befor the exam . But on the D-day what I will do in exam is self explanatory if you read th point 1 again.
May be all this is related to " groucho marx syndrome" in which the perso feels so bad about himself that when good things start happening to him , he feels afraid abd doubtful of all the happenings going around him . He doesnt know what to do and ends up taking the wrong decision and making a mistake again . Now this decision also haunts him and it goes in a infinite loop for him.
" Now this person has to create blog to vent out his frustration but what the fuck!!!!
Nobody comments (acknowledgement of reading) . so it seems like another failure to him . :D
Friday, November 7, 2008
Subscribe to:
Posts (Atom)
Posts
